Thursday, July 28, 2005

The message I'm sending

Evangelism is a great way to refine your theology and worship. When I start to actually talk to people about God, Jesus, etc., I have this strong desire to actually represent him accurately. Because of this desire, when the occasion actually arises, at the very moment I begin I become emotionally then mentally aware of all the gaps between the perception of reality that has been running my life and the perception of reality that takes Jesus into proper account (the one I want to tell someone about). What I'm saying is, I find out all the stuff I thought I believed about God but really don't when I make an effort to tell someone about it or even embody it. The reason I say that I find out emotionally and then mentally is that the first signs of believing anything like what God has done and is doing for the world through Jesus are (hardly containable) relief, hope, joy, love--basically all the fruit of the Spirit just come out all over the place at the moment you actually start to trust Jesus' power and intentions. It's when I've been pointedly called to talk about this king and what he's got going on that I realize (from the total lack of the above "fruit") that I've forgotten about him or dismissed him (practically speaking), and several of the implications of his existence, in my normal thoughts.

But that process, of course, gets me thinking better again . . . and the fruit begins to emerge . . .